The LOST Ones

Actual due date fast approaching
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Author:  Dot1 [ Wed Jan 07, 2009 6:38 pm ]
Post subject:  Actual due date fast approaching

Hi all,

have read all entries with great interest as I have continued to "what feels like clutch at straws for ways to cope with the grief since Mackenzie's passing in Nov. Her due date Jan 14th is fast approaching and as weird as it may seem to others I dont think I will feel much relief until then, in a sense there has been a huge feeling of being in limbo. As Xmas and New Years passed and now that the last of her baby friends has been discharged from NICU, I feel like Mackenzie has almost been forgotten and that its I alone that continues to try to come to terms with the fact she was 3 months premature and that we only got to spend 34 days with her. I guess what Im wanting to say is how helpful I have found this site in that there has been the forum to be able to vent and the opportunity to be reminded that at least I got to spend some precious time with my daughter. I would love to hear how others have commemorated their babys' due date.


Author:  Jessie78 [ Wed Jan 07, 2009 7:49 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Actual due date fast approaching

Hi Dot,
it's a horrible date approaching isn't it? It must be so hard knowing the other NICU's are going home healthy and happy :( Thank you for sharing Mackenzie with us the other month though, it really made an impact on me seeing all your gorgeous pics of your girl.

I knew I would find Sept 2nd 08 really hard, so we got out of town for that weekend and went up to the beach where D was conceived, kind of like full circle KWIM?
To be honest I felt a little relieved after that, like the build up was worse than the actual day. Doesn't get easier, just a teeny bit more at peace. Kind of :?

I hope Wed goes gently for you and you find a nice way to commemorate the day.

Author:  Julia's Mum [ Wed Jan 07, 2009 8:43 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Actual due date fast approaching

Hugs to you Dot, yep as the first anniversaries roll around it is like a kick in the guts all over again. But as Jessie put it here...
Jessie78 wrote:
the build up was worse than the actual day.

it is perfectly right, for me anyway. I think I psyched myself up into believing that it would be harder than it actually was. We were away for Julia's due date, staying in the Hawkes Bay at Clifton Beach, and I just took myself off down the beach and had a bit of quiet time to myself without DH or DS around, to think about our lil girl, then I went to the cemetary (even though at that stage Julia still wasnt placed there) and I just sat there and had a think there too.

I am sure that what ever you plan to do, it will be a beautiful way for you to remember Mackenzie, and remember that we are always here to listen.

Author:  GG's Mum [ Wed Jan 07, 2009 10:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Actual due date fast approaching

Hi Dot, I also found the build up worse than the actual day. I personally didnt doing anything to acknowledge GG's due date apart from sit on my bed with her ashes and had a good cry. Take some time for yourself to reflect and just to be IYKWIM?

Author:  queenbean [ Thu Jan 08, 2009 9:14 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Actual due date fast approaching

And I'm another one that's going to agree that the build up was worse than the actual day. DH and I took Eva's due date off and spent it at home. We let a balloon go for her from our garden, it was a nice peaceful day.

Big hugs to you.

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