Oh honey!

:bighug::bighug::bighug:

Huge Hugs Carley. I hope you manage to have a nice break in Auckland. Look after yourself xox

Hi all, well first off I would like to say a huge thank you to you all for your support over the last few days, they have been very trying to say the least. I am back home now and things seem to have calmed down for now. DH realises that the crux of his problem is is that he hasnt accepted that I am unable to work this year and his trusty right-hand woman is unavailable. He has spoken to the useless blardy worker and told him to pull his flippin socks up, because he is just shocking this year.(long story too long to tell). I too have taken stock of how I have been doing things and reacting to things, and have realised that although my way of grieving for our daughter is different to DH's, that what I was soing was hurting him and that wasnt good. We are slowly getting things back in order and are planning to go away this weekend as a family and spend some time alone, as next time we try it there will be another little body with us

Sorry for the lack of personals lately, I have been sneaking on and reading all of the news and for those of you that need hugs...

Had another good visit with Waikato yesterday, and they have said they are very pleased with the way that the pregnancy is progressing. Baby currently weighs 3lb 13oz , a gain of half a pound every week . And the plan now is for baby to get to the 6lb mark then Waikato will sign me back over to Rotorua and I will be able to have baby there . So in about five weeks time, I will no longer have to go to Hamilton. I have also been told that there is no reason why I cant have baby naturally and when I go back for my six week check they will do my tubes via keyhole surgery. But if I start naturally they will have to keep an eye on my c section scaring and if it looks like there could be a bit of tearing they will rush me of for a c section. So now the big thing is weather or not they will induce me... they do as my m/w is due to go on holiday when my due date comes around and she would love to be there when I have bubs as she was there when I had Julia too.

right I think that is all for now.. had better go and find us some accommodation for the weekend...

That's great to hear Carley. On all accounts - DH, bubs, you etc etc!! Where are you headed for the weekend? It will be lovely for you all to have some time out together I'm sure.

Take care sweets
xox

headed off to the Coromandel,so DH and DS will do some fishing and I will probably park up somewhere and read or finish my knitting


ETA: have to laugh at my ticker it says that bubs is almost 3lb....ummm it already is

Carley I was cracking up at the size of Bub actually cause um...hate to tell you that is what Kita was when she was born (well she was 3lb 14) and she was born at 31 weks 3 days.
That is one good sized not so lil bundle you are growing....must be all the counrty air a.
Glad that everything went well at the hosp and that Rota can take baby now cause What an arse Hamilton would have been.
And even better news about letting you try natural and the key hole tubes!!!!

OMG Carley, sorry it had to take you up and leaving for his male brain to work out his manner is not good. Pleased to hear he has said about his grieving process as men need to get it out too but how do we know if they dont talk. Pleased to hear all is getting back and a nice family time away is happening to hopeful start some good healing times.
And OMG grow buba grow aye....s/he is doing fab in there, s/he might not wanna come out LOL. Pleased to hear everything is going fab on that front and you wont have to go to hams if all stay great
Sending you some super hugs hun
How is B with all this going on? Hope he ok to hun

Oh wow Carley, sounds like a lot has been going on for you!
Glad there has been some good news in there for you though!

Well Carley I feel like a total idiot - I somehow missed this thread entirely until I realised that you were missing at the balloon release on Sunday Am so sorry to hear that things have been tough but glad that you have sorted things out a bit with DH. Gosh men are weird sometimes.
Am sad that I missed seeing you though
Hooray for big babies eh! I must say that I was glad to be induced with my Julia at 39 weeks as she was 8lb 4oz already by then.
Big hugs!

Aww honey, glad to hear things are going better with DH and yay on the news about baby and the birth and the hospital!!

I hope you had a nice weekend away!

Hey Carley - missed you on Sunday, but I glad things are getting a whole lot better on the home front

Okay for those of you that believe in this, this will FREAK you out...

Mum went to a psychic(sp) medium on Saturday... here is how her reading went...
After the reading had been going for a few minutes the medium picked up on a little girl, a baby, whose name started with J . The medium asked Mum if that had any significance to her, replied "Yes" (not giving away too much info, just seeing what she would come up with), Medium said she was an old soul who decided that it wasnt her time to come to earth as she had lots of work to do back in the spirit world. The medium kept saying that she was very busy and kept talking alot and was always on the move. The medium kept asking the spirit to tell her her name but she would so she asked Mum, Mum told her and the medium said I was getting June for some reason Then the medium said that Julia had a message for me The messge was was that everything was going to be okay and that it was ok to let go of Julia and to move on as she knows she will always be loved and that she will never be forgotten Then the next part was even more shocking, Julia said that we are NOT allowed to use any of her names for the new baby (the medium didnt know that I was pregnant again). Julia then said that this new baby cannot be seen as a replacement and that everything will be ok with this one Then the medium said to Mum is there any fabric in the house (mine) with stars on it? Mum said I dont know, medium said to find out as Julia likes it...Well low and bloody behold when Mum asked this I walked into Bayden's room where the bassinette is and there is stars on it!!!! Mum has never seen the bassinette !!
Then Julia went on to say that the new baby is worried about its Daddy as he is working too hard and has not given himself enough time to grieve (How true is that?!!! ) According to the medium this new baby is surrounding me with a protective white light and that there is nothing to worry about. I asked Mum if the medium picked up on the sex of the baby, but she didnt, but then said that the light surrounding me is also blue... so who knows it could be a boy yet...

But the most amazing thing out of all of this is the message for DH, that his little girl loves him i just know that DH would never be receptive to anything like this and that is a shame as I know that he would benefit from knowing that.


so there you have it, I am booked in to see this Medium on the 24th October when I go back up to Auckland to see the Phantom. That in itself is weird as when Mum was dialing the lady's number she was ringing Mum's number at the same time (insert Twilight Zone theme song here), and the medium said that she would juggle her schedule around as she feels that she needs to see me as there is more that I should know

So stay tuned and I will definitely up date this one....

Wow!!
I do believe in things like this. The Medium seems pretty tuned in!! I can't wait to hear what messages are for you!!
I think you should tell DH, even if he appears to dismiss it, he might take some comfort?? Who knows, men are a funny breed!

Ff rrrr eeeee aaa kkkyyyyyyyyy

you'll have to let us know how your reading goes.

I wanna see Kelvin Kruekshank

Oh Wow Carley - that is soooo awesome,

I am a believer but have been really dissappointed with the readings I have had since Satori passed - both have asked me if my to children are here yet, rather than telling me that the see a child on the otherside

I recently took Mum to Kelvin Crickshanks (SP)(from sensing murder) Soul Food group reading in Pukekohe. He started of the reading with Mum as we had seen him in the Carpark. He was full of the flu, which was probably a bit of an obstacle for him but he bought up alot of Mum's family who have passed as well as her ex-husband (my father) who apologised for the decisions he made that effected others - meaning my brother and I. He then asked if my two children were here - I hesitated and he said "one here, one there," which bought on the tears, and then he said the he could see my Father holding a child and that his mother was looking after both of them.

I wasn't that happy about it because I have had a very turbulant relationship with him, and hadnt seen him prior to his passing in April, for about 9 yrs. Mum understood how I felt but said that my Grandmother - his Mother - was a lovely person, and that she would be taking good care of her.

Kelvin didn't give her sex or age, but did say that the spirits wanted me to stop blaming myself and that they all know that I am a great mother, but that I need to believe that and realise it too.

I also went to another Medium prior to him but agian she asked if my two children were here I really wanted one of them to say - OMG you recently lost a little girl! I probably had big expectations.

I know I am writing a novel but I emailed Kelvin prior to the show to ask him about stillborn children and how they are read in the spiritual world and he said that they come forward in an older spirits arms.

I can't wait to here how your reading goes Carley - how exciting

Can I get the details of the Medium off you as it would be good to know of a good one in Auckland, where you can have a one on one reading

Wow that is amazing Carley. I've never really known what to think about mediums - I have heard good and bad things - but that is really freaky and really gets you thinking! Can't wait to hear how you get on when you see her.

wow Carley reading that just blew me away so I can only imagine how you and your mother feel now.
LOL I am pleased you are going and that is gonna be one fantastic reading if this one was any to go by. Wow speechless now..lol and thats not normal for me!

well will be watching this space to see what comes from your visit....

Well had another excellent visit with Rotorua....







I WILL OFFICALLY BE HAVING THE BABY IN 8 WEEKS TIME!!!!


they have agreed to so a c-section and do my tubes at the same time. The only way that I can have a vaginal delivery is if I start labour naturally, induction is too harsh on the previous c-section scar tissue.

I am off to a canlde lighting ceremony tonight for Baby Loss Awareness week, and will be lighting a candle for Julia . I will also be reading a poem out...this one
Ever Dear, Author Unknown
Those we love
Dont go away,
They walk beside us
Every day,
Unseen
Unheard but
Always near
Still loved
Still misssed
Ever Dear


I will read it out if the emotions dont get the better of me...

will be thinking of you doing your reading if you can manage it. If ya don't we know you were thinking it too
OMG 8 weeks..hello little baby!

8 weeks!!! Time has gone soooo fast!

Good luck for the reading Carley and 8 weeks!! Yikes, where did that go!!

Morning all Feeling like I have been hit by a bus this morning. I had the first of the two steriod injections yesterday too, and they did warn me that it would feel like I had a wicked hangover...well woke up at 5am this morning with a thumper of a headache... and they were right it does feel like a hangover . Now have to go back this morning and get the last one, so will probably feel like shite tomorrow too...


The candle lighting went well last night and I was able to read out my little poem . It was amazing there was a bit of wind at the cemetary last night but not one of the candles blew out it was like our wouldnt let that happen.

Right had better go and have a shower, might make me feel better and shake this blasted headache

Aren't those Injections just a arse!
Hurt like a Mother....
Yay for 8 weeks, you know that is not long a

Wow Carley I jsut read about the medium and that is so cool that she got through to Julia and she was able to give messages back to you.

Best of luck for the next 8 weeks.