Well it's high time I posted an update on how things are going, I've been pretty slack recently! I had my dopplers scan at 24 weeks and all went well which was a real relief. It definitely made a difference going back to the sonographer that we usually have, he has a much nicer bedside manner and is very thorough and careful. He was also able to tell us the baby's sex, which we are also keeping a secret! This is the first time we have found out the sex and it is really nice knowing this time round, but also having a surprise to tell everyone at the end. I definitely feel like I'm bonding with this baby better and it helps with the whole name choosing thing too. Angus wants to wait till the baby is born before naming it but we have a name that is miles ahead of the others on the list so I'm picking that that name will stick!

Since the 24 week scan I've definitely been feeling a lot more positive and hopeful, it also helps that we have finally passed the milestone of when we lost Maria and I know that this baby is bigger and stronger. Like you Manda, I am getting a heck of a lot of movement, it is reassuring but at times I wish it would stop, especially when I'm trying to sleep at night. My belly is enormous, it seems like I am one of these people who just sticks straight out the front (I was like that with Joel but even more so this time) and people have started expressing surprise that I still have 3 months to go.

I still struggle when people ask the question: "is this your first baby?" - I guess it's never going to get any easier. Lately I've taken to answering "no" and leaving it there unless the person quizzes me further.

I watched Dr Phil the other day and he was talking to a lady whose husband had committed suicide and she was struggling with the grief and feelings of guilt that go along with it. He talked about getting to the stage where you can put that book on the top shelf and not have to read from it every single day. I thought this was a great metaphor for the kind of grief process that we experience. I definitely feel like I'm at that point now, I'm not reading from the book every day - I still take it off the shelf often but it's not overwhelming me.

But sometimes I get knocked off balance. Last week we heard that a dear friends of ours who is a week further on in her pregnancy than me, her waters broke and she is in hospital indefinitely. It's been nearly 2 weeks now, the baby hasn't been born yet and they are trying to keep it in for as long as possible. It really upset me when I heard, I guess my mind started thinking the worst straight away and of course it brought the feelings from my own experience flooding back. It's just such a reminder that none of us have a guaranteed outcome, all we can do is hope.

Alana- Pleased to hear you had a great appointment the other day! Oh listening to the heartbeat....its such a beautiful sound.
Yes hun, you grieve and say what feels right to you! Only you need to know its working for you! Wishing you all the best for the next 3 months..wow has time gone fast!

Good to hear from you Alana and that things are going well and milestones are being passed.

That book on the shelf analogy is a good one.

best wishes,
Melanie

I saw taht Dr Phil too Maria - very powerful stuff!

Glad that your doppler scan went well, reassuring for you!

If it's any consolation with your friend, my Mum's waters broke at 27 weeks with my youngest brother (she had 3 out of 4 babies born prem) and she thought they would induce her and she would lose him, but they kept her in hospital flat on her back for 9 weeks on antibiotics to stop infection and ventolin to stop contractions, and he was born by caesar at 36 weeks, healthy as. And that was 20 years ago...

Does anyone know much about red cell antibodies? Just had a visit to the midwife this morning and from my last blood tests my antibody count is up and they are sending sample off for more testing.

Great to hear from you Alana. So glad everything is going well.

Strange about the red cell antibody count - not heard of that one before - I presume they are just being overly cautious after your past experiences. Fingers crossed everything is back to normal asap.

Take care

Hi

I think that Red Cell Antibodies is when your body recognises the babies blood as a foriegn object and makes antibodies to reject it. Its normal to have some antibodies, and its normal for your body to react in this way (the same with transplant patients who have to take anti rejection drugs). But when the levels get too high your body will stop providing the good stuff to the baby.

Hope this isn't too scary to hear, I'm not 100% sure that I have all the info correct so don't panic about anything I might have said until you confirm this with someone else. I'm sure that there is lots that they can do to prevent it from getting dangerous. It is very rare, I think.

Good luck with those results, I hope that it is nothing to be worried about.

Lizzie

Thanks for this info Lizzie, my midwife was trying to be really positive and tell me not to worry but of course it's impossible not to! I wondered about my body rejecting the baby..... she also said there could have been some transfer of blood when Maria died. I just have to be patient while I wait for more info I guess.

Hugs Maria! I hope everything comes back all good!

I don't know much about red cell antibodies unfortunately so I can't help there. Is it something to do with Rhesus status?

How have things come along now??? Did you get all your info and feel like you have the knowledge you need to know about?
Thinking of you and can't wait for an update on that growing bus

Alana,
Great to hear that you are doing well and that things are progressing, did you get results back yet from the tests? I hope that everything is ok.
How is your friend going?
My waters broke at 27 weeks with Nikita, They kept me in hosp till she needed to come out at 31 weeks, and well she is just fine.
Best wishes to you both hun.

Well my second antibody test came back negative so all is well. The specialist has asked for another growth scan at 32 weeks and I see her again at 33 weeks. I am down to fortnightly midwife visits now - yay! It makes the time go so much quicker. I had a really upsetting dream the other night, that this baby died in utero too. It was so realistic that it took me ages to work out that it wasn't true when I woke up. It seemed like baby knew I was upset because it started moving pretty much straight away as if to reassure me.

I am starting to go to a pregnancy yoga class tonight, hopefully it should help me to relax and also to be positive during labour. It just feels like the weeks are dragging by and I just want this all to be over and to have my live baby in my arms.

We have been talking a lot about names and have narrowed it down to 2. I can't decide which one I like more, hopefully when we see the baby we will just know which is the right name.

That is fantastic news Alana. I am so glad everything turned out well for you and your little bubs

May the days pass quickly for you.

Keep safe.

Claire

Oh yah Alana, AM pleased all is well with you and bubs. Lucky you get another peak at bubs when they re scan you! Hope you are feeling great and keep us updated